Catching Up

Well, hey there! I'm sorry it's been so long, but it's been pretty crazy in my neck of the woods. Here are some things that have happened while I've been out:

 

Did you guys know about this? Awesome comics featuring classic and contemporary Disney ladies, and they're all here. They're so cute.

 

 

I'm not going to lie: I will read this, if only for the piglet.

Did I ever tell you guys about the swine farm?

We went there last year as part of one of my AVS classes.

And it stunk.

I'd heard that pigs stink, but wow, you guys, do you have to smell it to believe it.

My grandpa says that's the smell of money.

He loves pigs.

When my mom was growing up, they had a pair named Pork and Beans.

Guess what happened to them?

Yup.

Dinner.

 

My mother had a traumatic childhood.

 

In all seriousness, I just heard about this yesterday. Bridget Zinn, the author of Poison, died of cancer.

 

"Bridget wanted to make people laugh and hoped readers would enjoy spending time with the characters she created. As a librarian/writer she loved books with strong young women with aspirations. She also felt teens needed more humorous reads. She really wanted to write a book with pockets of warmth and happiness and hoped that her readers' copies would show the watermarks of many bath time reads."

 

And then, here's the book synopsis:

 

"Sixteen-year-old Kyra, a highly-skilled potions master, is the only one who knows her kingdom is on the verge of destruction—which means she's the only one who can save it. Faced with no other choice, Kyra decides to do what she does best: poison the kingdom's future ruler, who also happens to be her former best friend.

But, for the first time ever, her poisoned dart…misses.

Now a fugitive instead of a hero, Kyra is caught in a game of hide-and-seek with the king's army and her potioner ex-boyfriend, Hal. At least she's not alone. She's armed with her vital potions, a too-cute pig, and Fred, the charming adventurer she can't stop thinking about. Kyra is determined to get herself a second chance (at murder), but will she be able to find and defeat the princess before Hal and the army find her?

Kyra is not your typical murderer, and she's certainly no damsel-in-distress—she's the lovable and quick-witted hero of this romantic novel that has all the right ingredients to make teen girls swoon."

 

Find out more here: Bridget Zinn

 

Okay, so maybe I wont be reading this books just for the pig. It does sound pretty awesome. And funny! What ever happened to funny books?

 

I did read some pretty good books over break. I didn't get to as many as I was hoping, but that's usually how it plays out.

 

 

I am so, so glad I read this book. It was a random pick from the library, and you guys, it was so cute. It's a book about a girl/boy friendship - which is pretty unusual these days. And it was so sweet. I feel like I should say something about the great character development, or the touching story, or the cool songs . . . but I'll just tell you guys it was super sweet, and leave it at that.

 

Plus, I don't really want to admit that I cried.

 

 

 

I can't tell you how long I waited for this book! I've wanted to read it since before the cover, and I think before the official synopsis, even. Wowza.

 

I didn't pre-order it because I was like, I'll save on shipping and just go buy it from the bookstore when it comes out! And so I went to Hastings (you know your town is small when the Hastings is the biggest book store) and they didn't have it. They ordered it for me and I got it 7 days later.

 

I hate waiting.

 

But it was totally worth it. There were some things I didn't like - insta love, I'm looking at you - and I didn't really care for one of the love interests. Why does the girl never choose the guy I want her to?

 

But there was so much awesome in this book that it doesn't even matter. I enjoyed the twists on the original Alice stories, and there were many moments when I was just struck with the cleverness.

 

 

 

 

"I had Christmas down in AFRICAAAAAAA!"

YOU GUYS. We're in DECEMBER. How did this happen? And Advent started this Sunday. We are so freakin' close to Christmas it's crazy.

Of course, to get to Christmas, we must survive finals week first. Gulp. Next week I only have one final, but it's a doozy. (Chemistry, have I told you how frustrating your are? Oh, I have? Well. Can I say it again?) And I have two portfolios due, with papers and stories and poems . . . and I'm sure everyone is going as crazy as I am at the moment.

So how about a Christmas-y song?

Muahaha. If you haven't heard of STRAIGHT NO CHASER, this is a travesty, and allow me to fix it. They have a multitude of amazing (and funny) Christmas songs. I just love them to pieces.

Happy December, everyone, and good luck on finals!

Cows?

It's kind of weird, actually. Every month, one or two people stumble upon my blog by searching "cows."

I have but one post where cows are mentioned. It is this post, with two silly poop jokes told to me by two silly kids. One is about a zombie. One is about a cow. This post is my 3rd most viewed, topped only by my Sleeping Beauty post and a giveaway post.

Obviously something needs to be done about this. People's cow needs are not being met!

Now, if people want to talk about cows, I can talk about cows. I've had a year of AVS. I worked in the dairy, I had a calf watch shift, I vaccinated, I learned how to brand, I studied diagrams and breeds and reproduction  . . .

Besides, I like cows. They're cute. And as long as you keep them feed, they'll love you forever.

My sister has this adorable little cow toy. It's super cute - it's head and back come off and go back together, like a little puzzle.

However, if you turn the cow over, it's not anatomically correct.

This needs to be addressed. Because cows . . . well, cows do not have six teats. Their udders have four compartments, so they have - drum roll, please - four teats!

Picture Source

 

See? Four milk producing compartments. And fun fact: the rear compartments produce more milk then the front. Also, to produce one gallon of milk, 500 gallons of blood have to circulate through the udder.

That's a lot of blood.

Now I send you forth! Go out into the world, spreading proper cow anatomy and milk production facts to those less fortunate. Educate the world.

The Ghost and the Goth



One of my favorite TV shows is Dead Like Me. It's not on anymore - excuse me while I cry - but it was awesome. It was about this girl, Gerorge, who died when a toilet seat fell out of the sky and hit her. But she didn't stay dead. Or, yes, she was dead, but she was still here. She became a reaper.

And you know that guy who was Inigo Montoya? ("You killed my father. Prepare to die.") He was in that show. So you know it was awesome.

Alona Dare–Senior in high school, co-captain of the cheerleading squad, Homecoming Queen three years in a row, voted most likely to marry a movie star… and newly dead.

I’m the girl you hated in high school. Is it my fault I was born with it all-good looks, silky blond hair, a hot bod, and a keen sense of what everyone else should not be wearing? But my life isn’t perfect, especially since I died. Run over by a bus of band geeks—is there anything more humiliating? As it turns out, yes—watching your boyfriend and friends move on with life, only days after your funeral. And you wouldn’t believe what they’re saying about me now that they think I can’t hear them. To top it off, I’m starting to disappear, flickering in and out of existence. I don’t know where I go when I’m gone, but it’s not good. Where is that freaking white light already?

Will Killian–Senior in high school, outcast, dubbed “Will Kill” by the popular crowd for the unearthly aura around him, voted most likely to rob a bank…and a ghost-talker.

I can see, hear, and touch the dead. Unfortunately, they can also see, hear and touch me. Yeah, because surviving high school isn’t hard enough already. I’ve done my best to hide my “gift.” After all, my dad, who shared my ability, killed himself because of it when I was fifteen. But lately, pretending to be normal has gotten a lot harder. A new ghost—an anonymous, seething cloud of negative energy with the capacity to throw me around—is pursuing me with a vengeance. My mom, who knows nothing about what I can do, is worrying about the increase in odd incidents, my shrink is tossing around terms like “temporary confinement for psychiatric evaluation,” and my principal, who thinks I’m a disruption and a faker, is searching for every way possible to get rid of me. How many weeks until graduation? - Goodreads

This book is targeted at a younger audience then Dead Like Me was, but Alona reminds me a lot of George. They're both have a sarcastic and cruel humor. They're both young, dead, and stuck here. They both have unresolved family problems.

The Ghost and the Goth is so cute. When I try to describe it, that's what I come up with - it was cute! But it's so true.

I was pleasantly surprised with the level of character growth. I was expecting a cute, light read, and it was, but that doesn't mean the writing was poor quality. The characters have depth and issues and good arcs - they don't end exactly where they started. Will and Alona are both very likable characters. I loved them together. At first there's this animosity, because Will is the school outcast, and Alona is this queen bee cheerleader type. But they're forced to help each other out and spend time together, and they don't hate each other quite as much as they thought. It's predictable, yeah, but it's cute. Sometimes books are allowed to be cute.

It's also highly addictive. I don't know exactly what made it so, but I went through all three books in the series like a bag of Christmas Bells. (Peanut Butter Cups, in bell shapes! Try them! You'll like them!) That is to say, quickly. You can't just have one, y'know.

So, The Ghost and the Goth - Do I recommend it? Absolutely, yes! Pick it up if you're looking for a good, fun read. You won't be disappointed.

Me, and America's Next Author Contest

Hey everyone! So, I entered a contest, and I need your help . . .

I entered my short story Falling in this online writing contest, and a part of the contest is based on public support. I would really appreciate it if you went and checked it out - you can find it here. You can write a review and leave a rating if you'd like.

I'm proud of my little story, and I hope you'll all enjoy it. :]

Thanks for your help!

Litterary Giggles and The Eyer Affair

If you're and English major, or read a lot of classic literature, then you need to read this series. Seriously, guys. My sister has these books and they've sat on our living room shelf for years and years. I discovered them over Thanksgiving break, and now, I'm tempted to name my future puppy Thursday Next.

 

Puppy says: Hello, I am cute.

Puppy came from here.

 

My mom says I am allowed to buy a puppy next fall, when my sister goes to grad school. But only if I can pay the extra dog fee, and pay for the food, AND still pay for college.

 

But this is beside the point.

 

 

 Welcome to a surreal version of Great Britain, circa 1985, where time travel is routine, cloning is a reality (dodos are the resurrected pet of choice), and literature is taken very, very seriously. England is a virtual police state where an aunt can get lost (literally) in a Wordsworth poem, militant Baconians heckle performances of Hamlet, and forging Byronic verse is a punishable offense. All this is business as usual for Thursday Next, renowned Special Operative in literary detection, until someone begins kidnapping characters from works of literature. When Jane Eyre is plucked from the pages of Brontë's novel, Thursday must track down the villain and enter the novel herself to avert a heinous act of literary homicide. - Goodreads

 Let's get this straight upfront: you do not have to be a fan of Jane Eyre to be a fan of this book. I know this, because I am not a fan of Jane Eyre. I thought Rochester was old and creepy and I didn't like Jane, but mostly, I thought Rochester was old and creepy. (I read it in high school, so maybe I was just immature. Psh, who am I kidding? I'm still immature.) Despite the title, Jane Eyre isn't a huge part of the story, and I actually really loved how it was incorporated.

 

And Rochester?

 

Oh, Rochester . . . well, he's not creepy here. I actually kind of loved him. A lot.

 

Actually, I loved all the characters. Let's do a quick roll call:

 

Uncle Mycroft -  quirky and brilliant inventor. I would love to jump inside this book and snag a few of those inventions for myself.

 

Spike - deals with the capture of Supreme Evil Beings. He's the only agent assigned to his area because, well, it takes a special kind of person to go against the SEBs. I love the scene where he first meets Thursday - Muahaha. Funny, funny.

 

Acheron Hades - the bad guy. He's a lot of fun. He's very evil, too, and he requires his little minions to do wicked things every day, like drive over the speed limit - through a mall. There's also this things about Felix's face, which is just gross, so I won't go into that.

 

Jack Schitt - I laugh every time I see his name. "Schitt" sounds like . . . Okay, I know I'm immature. I'm sorry. Jack works for Goliath, this weapons corporation that has too much control and not enough limits. Jack Schitt is this annoying bad-guy who's technically not a bad guy, because Hades is the bad guy, but whatever. He so is.  

 

Pickwick - I have to mention Thursday's pet dodo, even if he's not in this book much. At first I was imagining the dodos from Ice Age, those really dumb birds who had three melons stockpiled for the ice age? Yeah. Pickwick has grown on me, though.

 

And there's many, many more. But you'll just have to read the book to meet them.

 

 

 





Winners Announced!

Hey everyone! I was fully intending to announce the winners sooner, but my brother was feeling generous and decided to share his cold with me. So I've been blowing my brains out through my nose that last few days . . . actually, you probably don't want to hear about it.

Anyway! Winners! Yay!

Sarah figured out my clues, so she won her pick of the books. (I named by basil plant Dorian because of the book, The Picture of Dorian Gray. The painter who creates the picture of Dorian is named Basil.)

 

Sarah chose The Forsaken!

Brianna won Untraceable. Her favorite book of the year (so far) is Gunmetal Magic by Ilona Andrews.

 

Natasha won Starters. Her favorite is The Fault In Our Stars by John Green.

Congrats! Brianna and Natasha, you have e-mails waiting for you. After I have you mailing addresses I'll send you prizes out to you!

Thanks to everyone who entered!